Go Hungry for Feet

I’ve got a bone to pick with you, loser. You have not been contributing enough to my lifestyle recently. In case you’ve forgotten, I am your FINANCIAL DOMINATRIX and YOU are my FOOT PIG! You’re obsessed with my gorgeous perfect feet and it is your sole purpose to ensure they are well maintained and shown the respect and worship they deserve! So if you don’t pull yourself together and start doing your job, I’m going to be taking these feet away from you and we both know how torturous that would be for you. Even the mere thought sends shivers down your spine so I guess you’d better start paying up and prioritising these feet accordingly. Do what needs to be done for my feet. Sacrifice for my feet. Pedicures, designer shoes, heels, boots, I love them all and it is your duty to pay for them. My feet need to be top of your pyramid of needs, if you’re spending more on your mortgage or rent than you are on my feet, then frankly you need to downgrade your living arrangements. I don’t care for your quality of life, I don’t care if you have food on the table, I expect you to do your duty as my foot bitch! If you and others who are dependent on you have to go hungry, then so be it, quite simply, it’s not my problem. I expect you to go hungry in order to fund my next pedicure so you had better not let me down foot pig!