Cockblocked By Your Own Dick

Im your roommate and your best friend, which means we share alot together. The one thing Ive always wanted to know though is why youre still a virgin. Youre not bad looking. Youre funny and smart, yet it seems no woman ever wants to fuck you. You tell me its because of your dick so of course I need to know the details. This is the point where you pull your pants down and reveal that youre uncircumcised, which completely grosses me out. Its obvious that my sex life is going to have to be your sex life because youre never getting laid with that ugly thing attached to your body. I tell you all about how amazing sex is, while casually humiliating you and ensuring you never get out of the friend zone. No woman on earth thinks an uncircumcised dick is attractive... especially me.