Objectophile

I'd call you a sexless freak, but you've certainly gotten busy around your house. You're gonna become a SLUT for inanimate objects. You'll fuck anything since ya don't get any ASS! The one thing you REALLY wish you could fuck is a woman. Sorry, you don't have that in your home cause you're just an overall GROSS dude. Honestly, you are better off fucking things without a pulse. Even blind women reject you. FUCK, they wish they were HELLEN KELLER, after hearing your nasty pervert voice. Your sexual rejection will lead you to fucking every object in your home - from couch cushion to potato chips. STOP trying to get with women, it's not a thing. You're becoming an OBJECTOPHILE for me and you're gonna tell me ALL about your JUICY WOMANLESS SEX LIFE.